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Articles

Candy Crawford LCSW > Articles

Articles by Candy

Libraries

We are one. I love the smells, structures and sights within them. If my body had a chip the chip would designate its’ track to a library. Books are appendages…stepping stones paved to our souls, centers and thirsty minds. Our brains crave learning like a baby craves comfort. Living without learning is like loving without listening. Teach me, books. Enlighten, expand and enliven me.Books infuse me with a scent of knowing and evolving.

Today: I will be on the lookout for books. I will find and touch one and read a sentence. I will notice the connection between the words on the page and how they enter my mind. I will give thanks for all writers, editors, researchers and wordsmiths.

The Agony of Small Talk

Most of us avoid it. Many of us find it hard to bear. Some of us feel agony at the thought of it. For me it’s when I feel disabled. It feels so obvious to me. As if I’m sitting in a room unclothed with folks fully clothed. And waiting, waiting, waiting. Waiting for the subject to change. Waiting for an inquiry to appear. Will anyone bring up something with depth? Bring up their heart? Please share what has been perplexing or invigorating about being human lately. Will you ask me what has moved my soul?
Will you read me a line from a poem that caught your attention? Has anything brought you to tears? What is it like being you today? What have you seen that caused you to stare and feel awe? Can you slip inside yourself and share what you find? I can’t handle these discussions. I feel detached from you all.

How Do We FEEL This?

How do we feel this? How do we feel anger, sadness, disappointment, fear, and two hundred other emotions in a culture that promotes and prioritizes happiness? Today I was in my parenting group discussing how stretching it is for us sensitive parents to be in a household with a sensitive kid (or adult) in distress. We all agreed it demands exceptional strength and robust boundaries not to be impacted by the tsunami of their emotions. Sending the child to their room only instructs the child that it’s not ok to feel certain emotions. Are we crippling sensitive children? In a culture that supports a narrow range of emotions these kids with the trait are unprepared to live authentically with the range of emotions and intensities this trait allows. Happy, happy, and more happy. Happiness is fleeting. We are complex creatures wired with an exorbitant amount of diversity and color in our affect. No wonder many of us hide away or numb out when we experience difficult emotions. What a different world it would be if we could all just be where we are at: respectfully, separately and authentically. We need to tend to what is happening within us…and grant others that same gift.

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